A Very, Very Blue Christmas
by SHADO Commander
Summary: My entry to Whitem's Xmas contest. When Drakken decorates the lair, he sets a startling chain of events in motion, one that will affect Shego and Kim Possible forever. Bit o' KiGo, bit o' graphic violence and created and composed in about an hour.


Hmm. Some may find this story a bit shocking, but apparently it was the only way I could keep Shego and Kim from ending up naked and in bed. Still a bit KiGo-ish, though. Legal disclaimer: Kim Possible, Shego, Disney and The Disney Channel are all trademarks of the mighty Disney media empire. Kim Possible, Shego and Dr. Drakken created by Mark McCorkle and Bob Schooley. Use is probably considered fair under parody law, but just in case: this work was not created for profit.

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A VERY, VERY BLUE CHRISTMAS

By SHADO Commander

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Drakken didn't know why he'd decided to decorate the lair that year. But for some reason, he'd decided that he actually felt like celebrating. He'd even had a huge tree set up, with gift wrapped packages and cotton-fiber snow underneath, plus a fake fireplace with electric logs that burned cheerfully. Maybe he'd somehow sensed what was about to happen… or maybe he'd done it just because it irritated Shego, who growled and scowled as she had to go up ladders, nailing the garlands of tinsel and the strings of colored lights up.

"This is assinine," he could hear her mumble, but he could only grin, mentally agreeing that the 'ass' part was very nice indeed… even after all these years Shego never did seem to realize that he 'checked her out' whenever she wasn't looking; the woman's brain just didn't seem to work that way. Of course, there were reasons for that and Drakken had never given a damn about her brain. It was her brawn that he liked. That and the covert video footage that ran from almost every part of her quarters which provided a huge portion of his nightly entertainment.

"It looks lovely," He responded with a chortle as he admired the heart-shaped green rump floating overhead. Yes, a most wonderful holiday atmosphere indeed! "Absolutely magnificent, in fact!"

It was a shame he hadn't been able to convince her to wear the secretly modified 'reindeer antlers' he'd prepared… well, not YET, because, of course, she WOULD. After all, she HAD put on the Santa hat after his threat to hold back her holiday bonus. Of course, that holiday bonus would be conveniently forgotten once the modified mind-control chip in the hat took effect, turning her thoughts to evil and, of course, total obedience to one Drew Lipsky, aka Dr. Drakken. In fact, not only had she never received a holiday bonus, he'd barely paid her at all. Though he gave her an envelope every week, it contained a mere pittance for purchasing things like feminine hygiene products and other items that Drakken wasn't about to buy himself. Other than that, though, she received nothing. Because, unbeknownst to the rest of the world, Shego's conversion to the dark side had been quite involuntary. Six Christmases ago, Drakken had actually slipped the then-hero a prototype of his Uber-Mega-Mind-Thought-Controller chip in the form of a Toys For Tots donation, and had kept her as his unknowing lackey ever since.

Of course, there had been a few rough spots. He'd found that he had to apply the mental equivalent of a booster shot every so often to keep Shego's evil quotient up to par. Otherwise, the warring incongruities between her true nature and her mind-controlled self would tend to conflict. However, he'd soon learned that the weakening control would always reveal itself when the woman started to act a bit too uppity, which was why he frequently acted like such a jackass around her. When she started getting noticeably hot and bothered… ZAP! Another dose of mind control and she was back to being the perfect little henchwoman. And since he was able to control her mind into remembering things that hadn't happened, she didn't even suspect that she'd been taken over. Though she did have that odd reaction every time he mentioned mind control... oh, the irony!

Maybe that's why he'd been feeling so jolly. He hadn't been sure what he was going to be celebrating yet, but he had plans, oh yes! After years of work, he was ready to apply the same device that had kept Shego bent to his will across a slightly wider target area.

Specifically, the entire planet Earth. Bwa ha ha ha!

Yes, the Uber-Mega-Mind-Thought-Controller machine was perhaps his greatest creation… it had successfully kept Shego evil for six years now, but the signal had always had to be channeled via a remote transmission chip that was in contact with the victim's skin. But now, thanks to his latest breakthrough, a stolen microwave transmitter and a hijacked pay-TV satellite, he was finally ready to unleash its full power on the unsuspecting world! And the only one who could possibly stop him was…

"Hold it right there Drakken!" Kim Possible announced as she burst in through an air vent, still half covered with snow from the near blizzard that was raging outside!

Yep, right on cue. But there was no buffoon with her. He was off visiting his grandparents for Hanukkah and wouldn't be back for several days. And of course, where the buffoon went, the cursed little rat-thing went as well.

Which left Possible alone and without backup, and THIS time Drakken had come up with a clever way to stop the terrifying teen!

"No, you hold it!" He replied with a leering grin. "You need to look right above your head before you make another move yourself!"

Despite her best instincts, Kim's eyes rolled up, then her entire head followed as her jaw gaped open in shock.

"Oh you have GOT to be kidding me!" She gasped.

"Oh no, not at all," Drakken laughed evilly. For the very first decoration he had put up was hanging directly above her.

Mistletoe.

"There is NO WAY I'm kissing you!" Kim growled.

"Oh no, not me!" Drakken chortled, activating the mind control chip in the Santa cap. "Shego! It's time for your little fantasies to be fulfilled! KISS Kim Possible!"

"What? WHAT?" Kim gasped twice as the green woman stalked towards her! And she would probably have been even more horrified if she knew that the chip in the cap was powerful enough that, through the contact of a simple kiss, she'd be brought under Drakken's spell too! "Shego! What are you doing?"

"Sorry Kimmie," Shego spoke dully, her mind now totally under Drakken's direct control. "But I DO have feelings for you! I always have and…"

And whatever Shego would have said next was cut off as Kim attempted to backpedal furiously away. Unfortunately, the melting snow from her clothing had had just enough time to drip partially onto the floor, and as her heels hit the slippery slush, her legs flew out from underneath her! The redheaded hero flew backwards and hit the floor with a sickening crack… the crack of her head impacting with the lair's solid concrete floor. To Drakken's shock, it was accompanied by a horrifying red spray and Kim's body collapsed limply onto the cement, eyes staring sightlessly up at the mistletoe.

Shego screamed in anguish and grabbed Kim's body, but from the odd angle at which Possible's head hung, Drakken knew that, completely by accident, he'd somehow accomplished the one thing no other villain had ever managed.

Kim Possible was dead!

From there, it was almost anticlimactic. He'd planned to wait until Christmas Eve, but with the one force that had always opposed him no longer there to stop him, there didn't seem to be any reason to wait. Walking over to the far wall of the lair, Drakken pushed the "Control World Now" button as his broadcast mind controlling device activated. All of the lights except those on the Christmas tree dimmed briefly as the UMMTC tapped into the national power grid.

Within seconds all of North America was not only under his control, but no longer even remembered a time when it HADN'T been under his control. Europe and South America went a few seconds after that… the transmission of the control signal restricted by the speed of light. Only India proved briefly resistant, a result of a bug in the translation software, but within an hour, the entire world was now controlled as totally as Shego.

It shouldn't have happened… and yet it did. And as a result, the fate of the entire world was changed forever. All because of a little parasitic plant.

Drakken had won. He was ruler of the world!

Now he sat on his giant throne in what had been the United Nations, as dignitaries from around the world came to lay their tributes at his feet. And if any of them ever wondered why he had chosen to call himself Drakken, the Mistletoe King, they certainly never dared to ask the absolute monarch of the Planet Earth why.

_Yes,_ Drakken thought, _it was good to be the king. It was so good to be the…_

….

"Do you think he's had it on long enough, Princess?" Shego asked the redheaded woman snuggled next to her.

"Oh, it's only once a year," Kim smiled at the love of her life. Who would have thought that Drakken's ridiculous plan to have Shego kiss her would have backfired so badly on him? Because, as it turned out, the old fairy tales had actually been correct about the power of one's true love's kiss.

And when Shego HAD kissed Kim, the evil spell that had held her in thrall for six years was suddenly broken, and Drakken had found himself facing not just one but TWO very irritated female superheroes.

He'd surrendered immediately, of course, and had spent the last eight years here in the special escape-proof cell Global Justice had created for him. Not that there was much chance of him escaping anyway, now that his ace in the hole, the mind-controlled heroine Shego, was no longer mentally compelled to do whatever was necessary to rescue him. In fact, without Shego, he'd been pretty much forgotten by the rest of the world, with only his mother making regular visits.

Oh yes, of course, there was that one other exception. Every Christmas, Drakken was also visited by a certain well known pair of lesbian heroines. Who despite all their anger at what he had done to Shego also knew that, in a strange, perverse way, he'd also been the reason they'd found their soul-mates. And so, for just an hour every year, they turned Drakken's own mind control device back upon its creator, and let him imagine what WOULD have happened if Kim hadn't already held the same feelings in her heart for Shego as Shego had held for her.

"Okay, just a little longer," Shego agreed, drawing her Kimmie's sweet lips up for a kiss.

"It IS Christmas, after all."


End file.
